When one spouse has an affair, it’s typically an emotionally devastating experience for both people. Yet statistics estimate that between one-third and one-half of married men and women will have an affair at some point in their relationship. Although healing the damage is sometimes possible in these situations, many times, it results in the end of the marriage. Fortunately, while you can never completely ensure your spouse will never cheat, there are some steps you can take to discourage it from happening.
Be Honest About Attractions
People are often under the impression that once you get married, you’ll never feel interested in anyone else. This is a myth, and a highly damaging one that can create significant guilt and emotional anguish. In reality, it’s normal and natural to feel attracted to people other than your spouse. When you keep these feelings to yourself, they can build up and eventually wreak havoc. When spouses admit to one another that they’re feeling an attraction to someone else, it removes not only the guilt but also the secretive aspect, which makes having an affair more difficult.
Prioritize Your Marriage
With the tight schedules many people today have, they often become lost under the burdens of childcare, work, finances and household chores. Over time, maintaining a happy marriage becomes an increasingly smaller priority, which can drive the other spouse to have an affair because they feel neglected. To avoid this common pitfall, set aside unbreakable time every day to spend with one another, even if it’s something simple. Have lunch together, go for an evening stroll or grab coffee together before work. It doesn’t have to be hours. Even half an hour can be enough to support your relationship.
Set A Marriage Goal
Sit down together and write your separate ideas of a healthy, happy marriage. Once you’re finished, discuss them with your spouse. This will help you both understand what is important to the other, which relationship values you share and which ones you may need to work on. Use this information to create a goal for the marriage you want and refer to it often. By envisioning the future of your marriage this way, it becomes easier to steer clear of damaging affairs.
Do Fun Things Together
For many people, the everyday stresses in life take a serious toll on their marriages. When there’s no time to laugh and experience joy together, the bond between a couple weakens. Gradually, they drift apart until they seem more like roommates than a married couple. In order to replace the lost attention and intimacy, one or both people might get involved in an affair. Cut the risk of this by making a list of fun activities you both enjoy. Every month, select two of them to do together. Having fun as a couple reinforces your bonds and helps remind you why you fell in love.
Add Some Romance
Maintaining romance and a satisfying sex life with your spouse is the cornerstone to a happy marriage. Talk about what you each consider romantic and work that into your daily interactions. It’s also important to let your spouse know that you find them attractive and desirable. Some experts even recommend scheduling time for sex, even if the idea seems counter-productive. It fosters affection, intimacy and release of sexual frustration, which can go a long way toward preventing infidelity.